Comparing Yourself To Others Is The Beginning Of Unhappiness

by Cassi Eubank on 2013-04-18

 

Comparing yourself to others is the beginning of unhappiness.  We each have our own unique talents and abilities. Now I fully believe that all of us is capable of learning, doing or being anything we wish to, it is just that each of us has different preferences. Because of these differences, we spend more time doing the activities that we enjoy and derive pleasure from. The more time we spend working and playing with a skill, the better we become at it.

Each of us also has many similarities. One thing that seems to plague the human race is the way we use comparing to make us feel bad. Hopefully, you can become aware of how silly and useless comparing can be and learn to use it properly to keep you on track. There is one situation where looking at where self scrutiny is a good thing. But first, let’s look at this strange custom we indulge in.

But for some insane reason we tend to also use this as a weapon against ourselves. Once we compare ourselves to another person, we don’t just stop there. We don’t just observe the differences. We have to take it one step further and judge. Sometimes, if we are the one who “appears better off”, this judgment gives us a false sense of superiority. But more often than not, we judge ourselves, and very harshly, when we make personal comparisons.

Seriously, think about it. When we notice a person with something considered desirable that we do not have, or see another with something better than what we have, we somehow twist our thoughts and talk ourselves into believing that what they have reflects on our own self worth.

They have a bigger house

They have a more expensive car

She has a skinnier waist line

He has a better job

They go on more vacations to better places

Any of these thoughts should serve as a warning that you need to start thinking about all the many blessings that are in your life right now. The problem with allowing our minds to stray to the what others have is that we inadvertently shift from all that “they” have, to what we do not have.

Looking at what you lack is not a good idea for many reasons. First of all, when you start thinking about how you should be further along in life, how you should have a better car, how you deserve a larger house with a pool, how does it make you feel? I know it makes me feel pretty crumby. If I were to indulge in such nonsense, it would make me a little depressed and lower my vibrational frequency. It would drain my energy and joy. So why in the world would I do this? It serves no purpose to compare yourself to other, but it sure can do you harm.

And a lack mindset will bring more lack to you. Why would you do something that takes away from what you do have? The law of attraction works whether we believe in it or not. Every action you take brings you closer or further from what you desire on life. Why would you do that to yourself?

When you compare an apple to an orange, you will note the differences in texture, taste, smell and how you remove the skin to eat it. But you do not get upset with the apple for not being more like the orange. Nor do you get mad at the orange for not being like the apple. They are both awesome! Can you see how foolish it is to attach a negative, destructive emotion to comparing? Note your strengths and weaknesses so you can capitalize on your assets.

 

Here are 5 easy things you can do to break this  impulse.

Recognize that you are comparing yourself. Becoming aware and reminding yourself the devastating effects this activity can have is the first step to freeing yourself of it.

Ask yourself why you are doing this and if it is helping you in anyway.

Make a gratitude list and count your blessings daily.

Enjoy what is going on around you. Take pleasure in where you now are and get excited about what is to come.

Make a “Yeah, I’m Bad A$$ List” and write down all yourstrengths. Any time you accomplish something or do something good, note it! Write it down and refer to this list to remind yourself how much you rock!

Remember, you are awesome. You are special and you have many, many gifts. If you want a skinnier waist, make it a priority. If you want a better vacation, you could research ways to go in the off season to make it affordable. You can get to where you want to be and there is only one person you should be comparing yourself to. That is the person you were yesterday.

When you look at where you want to go, and set a course, it is a good idea to check in frequently. It’s like reading the road signs on a road trip. You want to make sure you are on track. But this is YOUR life. Do the things that make you happy. Be the best person that you can be. Make the choices that will mold you into the best version of you. Make the choices that will allow you to create the life of your dreams.


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Cassi Eubank
Results Coach Cassi Eubank is passionate about showing women how to create extraordinary success and fulfillment in their life by changing their BS (belief system) and connecting with their purpose and passion. After spending over a decade studying the psychology of success, she has created an innovative and effective system, implementing techniques which will unconsciously keep you motivated and focused, increasing your level of success and abundance in all areas of your life. As a speaker and author, she shares with others to guide them to the results they desire and deserve through her Train Your Brain for Rock Star Success programs. She is also passionate about health and wellness and hosts a KYSS Retreat (Kickstart Your Skinny Self) which is mostly about taking care of yourself and having a mindset for living a healthy, active life. That with her famous accountability calls will give you results in your waistline and your frame of mind. Visit her website to learn about upcoming speaking engagements, workshops and events where you can connect with Cassi, or to read her blog along with other valuable freebies that will be gifted to you. www.CassiEubank.com

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