Confidence and self-love are critical aspects of your child and yourself that need to be developed because without them, you will always settle for less than you can have and deserve in life. You don’t want that for your children or yourself.
While I continue to stress the importance of confidence and explain some of the ways our mind works so you will better be able to harness the power of your mind, I want to make sure you get techniques and strategies NOW. Last week meditation was the topic and this will help you develop confidence and self-esteem. I recommend it as a life-long practice. Yet sometimes you just need something a little stronger. Something fast that has a lot of impact.
That would be the Circle of Excellence. The Circle of Excellence is an NLP technique that I love to use in my practice. The premise of NLP, or neuro linguistics, is that we each have all the resources we need inside of us already. We just need to learn to tap into them.
We are born with one voice, one mind that is connected to the universe and source of all abundance and information. As we start being told we cannot do things, we are wrong and we are not good enough to do things, the second voice of doubt emerges and becomes loud and overbearing. Through NLP, you are gathering information from your subconscious mind. The mind that uses your original sweet, pure voice of truth.
In the Circle of Excellence, we will get into a state of confidence, certainty and pride, then anchor that state. By anchoring it, we will be able to access that strong emotion when in a situation where we need that attitude to get the results we desire.
How well this works for you depends on your imagination and how well you can intensify your feelings. This is why doing the Circle of Excellence with a certified NLP practitioner is usually much more effective. Just remember, pretend is your friend!
In this case, confidence is the feeling we are going for so I will pattern my example around that.
1. Imagine a circle on the floor in front of you. Make sure it is big enough for you to step into. Think of it like a spot light shining on the floor in front of you.
2. Relax and clear your thoughts. Take several deep breathes.
3. Imagine a time when you felt confident and pretend it is happening now. Or even pretend you are in a scenario where you have a big project you just completed or a presentation you just gave. You know it’s awesome, you were awesome, life is awesome and you feel good. You worked hard, prepared and you crushed it! You feel good about the work you put it and it was easier than you thought. You have mastered a new skill and are ready for your next challenge. You are unstoppable. You knew you could and you did it! And you did a great job. Everyone is so impressed with you. You are proud of this accomplishment and know you have earned it. All your efforts paid off in a big way. Can you feel the pride welling inside you? Notice how you are standing a little taller. You realize you are smiling from ear to ear. You have a peaceful calm washing over your stomach and there is a warm glow in your chest, filling your lungs with each breath you take.
4. Look at the imaginary circle and project the power of those thoughts, the energy and vibrancy into circle.
5. Notice what color the light is. Does it shimmer, is it moving? Are there sounds, perhaps taste or smell?
6. While noticing the color and texture of the circle of light, make sure you are sending all that confidence, love, and certainty into the light. When it feels so incredible you just have to step in, then go ahead and jump right in.
7. Feel how this energy soaks into your skin. Breathe in that high vibration and healing. Allow the purity of light into your soul. Feel every cell in your body tingling with vibrant energy. Feel the confidence, the pride. Enjoy the certainty
8. Anchor that state with a word or gesture. For example, if you choose the word yes (a high energy word), make sure you say it with excitement and enthusiasm. It should be more like YESSSSS!!!!!!! If you select a gesture such as raising your arms in victory while tilting your head back while saying yes, make it a strong movement that is filled with the power of the energy you are harnessing.
9. Before the feeling fades, step out of the circle and shake it off. Ask yourself if you smell popcorn (a state break) and resume your normal state.
10. Repeat a few times if you like to lock in the state.
11. In the future, you can imagine that circle and just by stepping into it, you will feel more confident, certain and good about yourself and life.
12. Alternately, you can also repeat the phrase or gesture you anchored in to achieve the state of confidence you need.
I am dedicated to making sure we raise our young to be confident, successful adults who appreciate themselves as well as the possibilities and gifts life has offered them. I always like to remind myself that the best way to teach is by example, which is why we adults will want to implement these strategies as well.