There is something I see in my clients consistently that I call the heart-mind disconnect. This happens when your mind (brain, logical processing of information, where you decide what to think) believes one thing and your heart (soul, your connection to the universe, God and the source of all abundance and creation) believes another.
When I am speaking on confidence and self-love, I will ask the question, “How many of your truly believe you are amazing and beautiful? How many of you woke up and got totally stoked that you get to spend the day with YOU?”
Usually 90% or more of the room raises their hand. They are beautiful, they love themselves, waking up and getting a chance to hang out with their own bad self makes them very happy. Yet, Dove brand did the research and in a global study found only 2% of women will describe themselves as beautiful. Why the discrepancy?
Because while we know at a soul level that we truly are magnificent beings of light and love, when asked in the presence of a crowd of our peers where we are “expected” to know our value, we tap into our hearts and say what we know to be true. We rock. Yet when asked in a more “clinical or anonymous setting, we answer with our minds. We lack self-esteem and confidence.
Perhaps there are times when you feel you are red carpet ready with incredible value to offer the world. Other times you wonder why you bother with makeup at all and want to shrink. Be assured that until your heart and mind are congruent, this may be inconvenient, but it is quite normal.
AND… IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!!!
The beliefs we have in our mind were put there early and have been reinforced our whole lives. It explains so much when you ask yourself why it can take a tremendous amount of strength to stay focused on the positive in life. When our heart says one thing and our mind says another, we feel “out of sorts” because we are!
It takes time and commitment to reinforce the new, better way of thinking that will make you happier, healthier and wealthier. When you are not wasting time with negative thoughts, you can use that time and energy to create the life you want. You are happier because you get better results much faster than ever before. You start manifesting with ease and grace. If you are willing to develop these habits of excellence, life as you know it will be changed forever and you will be living life on a whole new level. It is the key element of my Train Your Brain for Rock Star Success program and it will be the best training you have ever experienced. The habits of excellence you will develop will benefit you for the rest of your life, giving you all the skills you need to achieve effortless success.
Clearly I love this topic and I could go on about for hours. I am so passionate about showing others how they can live a life without limits. I also love giving practical ideas and solutions that you can apply right away.
If you start to doubt yourself or think negative thoughts about yourself, (I’m not beautiful, I am not smart, I’ll always mess things up) ask yourself three questions.
a) Why do I think that?
b) Am I sure it’s true?
c) So what?
a) Why do you think that?
What makes you think you are not smart? Maybe you can’t rewire the electrical on the house, yet I bet there are hundreds of other cool things you do know.
DON’T COMPARE YOURSELF WITH ANYONE ELSE!
b) Are you sure that it’s true?
Most of the negative things we hear about us are not true. When others do not treat us well, we wonder what WE did to deserve that behavior. This leads us to think there is something wrong with us. When parents tell us we cannot do something, we feel unlimited and when we are told we have limitations, it feels wrong and we start to think that we have something wrong with us. When people are just rude or say things about us that aren’t true, we wonder if they know something we don’t and doubt seeps in. Most of the time, it’s not true. And even if it is…
c) So what?
Maybe you always mess up cooking because you don’t really like cooking. So what? Maybe you did make a poor choice in your last relationship. So what? Perhaps when you gave your speech, you didn’t speak loud enough. So what?
Not perfect? So what, welcome to the real world.
Didn’t do as well as you wanted to? So what, next time you will do better through what you learned this time.
If you learn from things that did not work out the way you intended them to, YOU WIN!
Bottom line, believe the thing that makes you feel the best.
If your heart believes that you are awesome (and you are) believe it. Listen to no other internal or external voice. Entertain no other thoughts. Soon your mind will catch up and believe it too. After all, just as you feel better when you nourish your body with great food, you will feel better when you also select the thoughts that will nourish your mind and soul.